Monday, December 29, 2008


Colors as we all know are of a wide range. Between what is color?, sorry there are a lot of people who give a lot of definition to it and I’m not interested in explaining / arguing which is the right one here as I’d like to take this article on a different note and this article doesn’t revolve around Chromatics. The one I liked as the definition of color is “Color is the visual perceptual property corresponding to human”. The interest of this article would revolve around the psychological perceptual stimulus of humans with their visual perceptual property…Oops I mean the color. This is purely from my personal perception and this interpretation doesn’t need to have any proof: P.

Major visual perception revolves around Red, Green and Yellow and the rest of the colors are a combination of these three including illusions. They way one sees them depends on the ratio of how these are blended with each other. Similarly the human psychological perception revolves around the good, bad and a makeshift balance which is the animal in everyone, it generally favors the good and also do the bad in certain circumstances which makes a person very similar to illusion. Different colors form with the different proportion of the three master colors and similarly different nature forms with the different proportion of these three psychological thoughts.

Generally everyone looks the color with the same visual perceptual property unless they are visually handicapped, but I always wondered why the one which looks pleasant to me looks very disturbing or unpleasant to others and vice versa. This is purely on the mindset or the way how we look at it and at the end all the colors are pleasant and colors add a lot of values in mind. This somehow conveys me that both these psychological and visual perception has a proportion in our brain.

Well we also have different kind of same colors, I mean by adjusting the brightness and contrast we get them and we name it differently and these brightness and contrast is added by the surroundings / the visibility and similarly in the psychological perception I would say the human tendency to justify himself / herself on good and bad is with their surroundings [I mean the people around them] and to a great extent I strongly argue this point. The brightness and contrast I discussed would relate to the ego and selflessness here. The ratio of this would be obviously in proportion with the way the fellow person’s perception if not initially, but with a certain amount of time.

If these brightness and contrast are set right on the node then all the colors are pleasant to everyone!

P.S : The views expressed in this article is purely of author's imagination and it might contradict with any of the theories and the author is not responsible for the same. :P

Monday, December 15, 2008

Dilli - meri jaan

Thought to pen down a long ago... "Dilli" - meri jaan

Its five plus years for me in Dilli now...... I remember the first day of me stepping in Nizamuddin Railway station at 22.30 hours on a Chilly November 17, 2003.... I was not exposed to such chillness before and the mercury must have read around 17 deg C. Just with a help of a sweater and a shawl I found a 6 feet place in the second class waiting room to rest myself. I knew no one in Delhi at that time and I got a contact of an IIT PhD student from someone and I didn't want to disturb him at that late night. The next morning I got an auto that negotiated with me for a couple of minutes and agreed to take me to IIT at Rs. 70/- with three more persons along with me who wanted to go to Malviya Nagar. I was not a south Indian who knew nothing in Hindi but I was smart enough to argue at that point of time as I knew Hindi and was able to pretend that I'm not going to be an "ullo". But finally my dear auto wala made me "ullo" by making me sit in the front seat along by his side and the rest of the three persons at the back side and started to ride. 35 minutes later when they got down they paid 40 bucks to that guy and sitting in the front seat and getting exposed to the chillness I was freeze and when I saw them paying 40 bucks I was shocked to believe that I'm being cheated here. He made me sit in the back seat now and started to smoke even after my request to drop the beedi. I joined my duty the very same day. Got introduced to a set of colleagues and was staying with the PhD student for a couple of days. I started to hunt a room for me the second day and was successful on the fifth day. I could manage to pull out a single room without a kitchen & shared bathroom for a rent of Rs. 1500/- at Katwaria Sarai, very adjacent to IIT. After a week of residence in that room and the interaction with my colleagues, and my environment and people at Katwaria Sarai and their behavior and to add up all the chillness!!!!..... The only thing I could wish for is to quit my job and run back south!!!!.......

December brought more chillness and literally I had nothing to do at my job as it was winter vacations and I was killing my time and seriously the most disgusting moments of my life. I can't sit idle in a place for a while, I need to do some damn thing!, else I'll go mad. Thankful the semester started and I had an opportunity to interact with my first set of students. That brought me some change in the world where I had nothing to do. Honestly speaking everyday I was expecting 13.00 hours so that the heat transfer lab would start and I'll have some opportunity to interact with my students...... life started to change. New friends, in the form of my students who literally were now getting me exposed to dilli. I started to explore new places and started to go out with them. Generally we get to see south Indian students going out with south Indian people / friends in IIT. I also used to do the same, but by doing so I got to understand that my views of seeing people around was with a mind set of a south Indian [no offense meant to anyone], which clearly is a negative way of living. Now I decided to do it with an open minded thinking. Suddenly winters seamed so pleasant [month of February], the roads were blossoming with colorful flowers on both the side. Dilli started to make me think that she has something more in her :).

The culture and the lifestyle of Delhi'ites are something which I started to admire for. I started to roam around Delhi alone. I've explored a lot of markets, roads, centers, exhibitions alone and sometimes just by walking. This was just to get used to the lifestyle of people and to understand the local people and I used to interact with them. I had all my weekends with me where I had nothing to do..... I was happy at the summers because we are used to it. I roamed a lot and got to see a lot of places and people. Suddenly I started to feel that this place has something in it which I could relate to but I couldn't get what was that. The end of the year made that happen. I went on a trip to Goa with my students, where I got to know about AID.. And probably that was my New Year gift to say [a separate blog would come up briefing it up how it happened]. From there on I got to see a different Delhi..... Non stop journey and five years over by now... WOW!!!!...

Some so special things I would like to point out about our Dilli are.... Chandni Chowk ki galiyan, nai sadak ke stationary shops, Darya Ganj book market, Paranthe wali gali, Gol Gappes, lassi, chilly winter mornings, hot hot summers, Radio Mirchi RJ's, blue line busses and its conductors, mixed culture, different accent Hindi language, art and craft bazaars, Dilli Haat Momo"S, dance, drama, cultural activities, India Habitat center, and not to forget Dilli de kudiyaan :P. .... Dilli simply rocks in every aspect and its one city which makes you to get obsessed with her once you start to spread across.....

In simple terms Dilli ne mera "dil li"

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Vaaranam Aayiram - A Visual Poem

If you want to watch a visual poetry then go for “Varanam Aayiram”…. I’m pretty much disappointed with the media’s review on movie. If they expect a treatment of the earlier Gautam Menon movies and enter the hall then its obviously a shock for them as Gautam’s protagonist is going to tell a different story. If one can’t relate to the scenes happening there to their day to day life then I feel pathetic for the people. It’s a well etched out portrait of the father and son relationship and obviously Surya excels in both the roles.

To show a man with six packs abs as a 17 year old kid needs something like an extraordinary effort and man! To all our surprise Surya brings that out. The film talks about the life between an urban father and son, so the dialogues in English makes sense, but our media is on the higher note saying “Naduvil varum tamil vasanagal idhu tamil padam enbadhay ninaivootugiradhu” [The tamil dialogues in between the movie reminds us that we are watching a tamil movies]. Come on guys just peep into any of the urban families these days. You hardly get them talking in tamil [please note that I have a very high regard for our language].

It has power packed performance, from every single cast and a poetic experience throughout. If you love to sit on alone on an edge of a rock and enjoy just starring the elegance of nature for hours in woods, then this movie is of your genre. People talk about logic; come on let me know one place where there is no logic in the movie. A single frame where they show father Surya working in Kerala has a “Mathrubhumi” calendar hung behind them.[I’ve only seen such perfection in Kamal’s Hey Ram! Earlier]. If you expect something more than this then “Sorry”.

I didn’t have a father like what the character had!, I wish I could have such a father in my next birth [If at all I have any], and I could see myself [what I thought I’ll be when I become a father], in Krishan’s character and probably others might not have seen that.

I recommend this movie for every movie lovers, if at all we stop welcoming such movies, we’ll be forced to watch the run of the mill genre of moives again and again.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Chandryaan.... meri yaadein

With Chandrayaan launch @ 06.10 hours, 22nd October 2008, I feel like looking back on the days at our Advanced Materials and Ceramics Division, INSTEF area, Vikram Sarabhai Space Centre, ISRO, Trivandrum where we guys were doing a lot of fun filled research on developing Ceramic material for Space Capsule Recovery Experiment, which was launched somewhere in the middle of 2007 and was first phase to this Chandrayaan and our preparation of Reusable Launch Vehicle. I joined as a trainee with lot of pride and felt honoured entering one of the premium research laboratories of our nation. The exotic location of our centre adds more value to the feel. It always feels like being wanted.
I must have been blessed to be a part of the entire work and believe me being a Chemical Engineer; I never knew that a Chemical Engineer can do so much of things. I got a few great colleagues and friends. It was a wonderful opportunity to learn a lot of things and I prepared myself to listen to people and do what they tell me to do. The very next day to my surprise, my scientist Mr. Ajith Nair discussed with me about why we are doing the project and told me whatever work have been done so far from the scrap. Man, believe me it’s a hell lot of work and complicated things and from the moment on wards my opinion towards the government research organizations took a new shape. The very next command which he gave to me was a sweet shock. He said “Do whatever you want, try whatever you like to, but please do keep documentation”. It was a jackpot to me.
I got introduced to a few more “Great” gentle men there. One thing is for sure, I’ve always been blessed to have wonderful people around me. Here too I got the same. There were a few skill men around with us to help us in fabricating or making whatever we needed. To add to all these things, our centre Head was always on tour and we had full freedom from our scientist and the assistants there. Our head was also a freely moving person but we used to have a lot of fear and respect for him. We called him by a pet name “Singam” [meaning LION] among us. Within a week time I understood that this is a base project for India’s entry into the elite group of countries who have Reusable Launch Vehicle or to simply call “Space Shuttle”. And if this experiment is successful then we’ll be in a position to make RLV’s on our own.
I will not discuss more on what work I did there as it comes under Official Secrecy Act and I am not supposed to disclose it. I remember we were allotted a new laboratory on a new building. We were preparing and arranging our experimental setup’s there and was making it ready for the inauguration. To our surprise VSSC Director was the guest who was coming to inaugurate and he was Dr. Madhavan Nair. I never imagined that a director would come to our lab for a visit. We did our best to make our laboratory look pleasing and we generally did that everyday.
As my scientist advised, I used to maintain the log book for the entire laboratory. In that I generally write whatever work we did the entire day in one note book and in the other one I used to name the samples and track it according to its movement in the lab with time. Apart from that we had a white board at the entrance where I label out the day’s work in the morning and after having a look at it everyone used to do their part accordingly. It gave a very systematic approach to the entire research as well and we were able to sort out things very quickly.
That day too, I wrote things as I use to do daily. We had another board inside our lab where I wrote the briefing of targets achieved by us. Suddenly when director saw the board, he stopped for a while to read it across and asked my scientist who wrote this? And he searched for me in the crowd and called me to introduce me. The director with a smile congratulated and said “You have a very good handwriting, Keep it up”. Our scientist also showed him the log book I maintained and the director was with all praise. Then he wished us all before he left.
This is an unforgettable thing now, as I can proudly say that I got appreciated by ISRO chief
J. There are lot more fantasy and fairy tales from my ISRO labs which I would share later.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Flood Relief Work at Bihar..... An Experience

First, I would like to mention that the flood in Bihar is not a normal flood at all. A river has shifted its course in this biggest ever disaster Bihar has seen. It needs a deeper understanding before thinking of any kind of relief or rehabilitation work.

I visited Bihar to understand those issues and what problems the people of Bihar are facing. In the media though there were news, which stated about the flood and the river shifting its course, I never was aware of the magnitude of the disaster. On the first day when I reached at Saharsa, I thought of visiting the Mega Camps which government has organized in and around Saharsa, The camp I visited had a population of about 2600 people in it where there were arrangements for food, medicine and shelter for the people. However, the people were not happy with the distribution and the way the camp operated, but still that was a well managed and properly arranged camp. I started to think about why there are many requirements, when the people are properly taken care in a shelter in the camps? I thought I might probably get the answer in the next couple of days in which I would be staying here and interacting with people. I interacted with Ranjana [women at the camp who had a story to tell about why she is here today? She lost her husband to the river. Likewise, there were many Ranjana’s and many more stories.

We on the next morning planned to conduct a medical camp at deep in the district where any NGO’s or the Government aid has not reached. We earlier identified the blocks and the panchayats we could possibly work together. That day we went to Kishanpur Panchayat along with 6 doctors [who were a part of Lion’s Club team] and a few more volunteers. The local volunteers took care of the arrangements of the camp at the village Bhajanpatti. We were exactly located on the bank of a place where we could only see water all around. Its one of the most affected areas through which the river was flowing earlier. Still the water over there was finding its way to drain down. The local volunteers took care of the responsibility of brining in people from the villages using the boat and local volunteers. When they went in the boat to bring in people then I understood that there are many of such villages spread all across the water, where still people are surviving. They are not in a state where they are willing to leave their village and move on to the camp. The reasons are the following.

  • A person who has his / her house at the village was finding very difficult to leave that place where they have cultivated and farmed.
  • The mega camps can only provide shelter for a particular amount of time and after that.
  • People who had their cattle over there were never moved out and they were more worried upon their cattle as that are the income generating source they have.
  • Most of people don’t even come to the mega camp, which would provide them a place to stay.

We checked more than 850 villagers that day at the camp. It covered 5 villages of Kishanpur Panchayat namely Surmaha, Pama, Kishanpur, Bhajanpatti and Paharpur.

The next day morning the doctor’s team left to Kanp for their medical camp and I went to Triveniganj area for relief material distribution, which we got with us and to interact with the local people. Our coordinator Rajesh guided us, and it was shocking to see the water flowing like a river on the agricultural land. The land where the water has recited is filled with sand and some lands were with water, which had a lot of algae and other things, which gave a bad smell. This is just the story of the villages on the banks of the flowing river. We reached a canal in which there was a stream of Kosi flowing earlier and with this flood the canal broke and the water went into all the villages on the left end of the canal. Fortunately Triveniganj town escaped from this. Most of the roads were broken and is filled with water and when we got down the canal we could see an ocean in front of us where some boats were operated.

I got to know that there are tents for about a stretch of 120 KM by the village people on the banks of the canal [both sides] who have came from the villages inside the current ocean. Kosi was flowing with lot of anger and current in front of them. The agricultural lands were filled with the silt spitted by Kosi. Army men were operating boats at shift basis to distribute relief materials brought by NGO’s deep into the village. There are a lot many people still in the villages deep in the areas that are trying to protect themselves from the flowing water. With water all around them for more than a month now, some are dieing because of the disease spread there. It’s really pathetic that the government relief materials have not even reached the people on the banks of the canal where people are starving for food. They rush whenever they see a truck or van running on the road imagining that they may get at least a pack of biscuit or a piece of bread. These two lac or more people on the bank have survived with the help of the local people and the army men who’ve rescued them from the village. They all are carrying a high hope that one day the water will recite and they’ll move back to their village, but the question is what will they do over there? There is no chance for agriculture at least for the next two years after the water recitation as the lands is with silt. The silt thickness is more than half a foot by now. Most of the cattle’s died / got carried away by the water. Those who have cattle’s in the village are finding difficult to feed them now as they are surrounded with water. Cattle’s are also dieing because of the diseases spreading.

It was hard for me to talk to the villagers there. They were so kind enough to ask for a cup of tea, though they were starving to death. I have no words to express the gesture they had for us, but I couldn’t find what I can do for them. They all have lost something or the other. They all were so normal with a whole lot of pain in them, which were visible only after we started to talk to them. Otherwise people will find them normal and don’t even realize that they’ve been affected. Millions of thanks to the NGO’s and volunteers who’ve and are trying to keep faith and hope in the people. It’s a shame on the government that they are helpless and pointing fingers on others for the entire disaster.

If something has to be done, it’s not just giving clothes or food or shelter to them temporarily, it’s the long time rehabilitation and livelihood back to them once the water gets recited.

I would also thank to the people of Bihar for being so kind. I had a different picture about them before I went there and now I have an entirely different picture for them. There is loads of respect from me for them.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008


விரைவில் வருகிறது....

Thursday, September 4, 2008

Siksha Adhoori.... [Education Incomplete....]

That morning he had a class test. He knew that he hadn’t prepared for it at all. He prayed to GOD that the teacher should not come to school so that the test automatically get cancelled which he knew that it had a very less probability. Still he made up his mind that he would go in and give the test and manage to see what happens after that. Suddenly something sparkled in his mind and he remembered the India Australia One Day match that day. Though he was aware that India would loose the match, but yet he couldn’t resist himself to choose for the match between his match v test contest. He also remembered the other day when he skipped the match for the test. He didn’t do the test well and because of that he was badly scolded by his teacher. He hated his routine tests every week. He decided to sit and watch the match. One of the most common reasons he had to take a leave was loose motion. That day also he did the same and took an off to the school and enjoyed the match. At the end of the day India lost as he predicted and also the teacher didn’t come to school. Alas!... the entire fun of the day went off…..

This is one page from my Diary and if I turn back the pages of my diaries I can find ‘n’ number of such stupid but interesting stories. I hope every reader here might have even more interesting stories to tell…. When deeply assessed the problem is not just the exam which I feared about, it is the post mortem which will happen after the exam which feared me…… some how I felt treacherous to myself at times. Without confusing too much I would straight away take you to the issue which I want to discuss here :) , it’s about the educational system followed in the school.

Generally there is a feel that children are mischievous and they can be made disciplined only by a proper way of bringing them up. This thought is there at both school and at the house, but many hardly fail to understand that children are children. They are supposed to do what they want to do and we have no right to stop them doing it. A child start to learn things from the very next day it comes on this earth. The child knows when to cry, when to laugh and to whom it should pass smile. When we are not the ones who introduce these senses to them, then why we try to teach them common sense [rather we should learn it now :P]. Now after the parents its time for the school….

School is the place where children mentor’s themselves (I really mean it). I feel teachers should play a role in making the children mentor themselves rather than they play a mentor’s role. Most of our school education has routine classes where a teacher teaches a fixed curriculum and they never bother about what the child needs at all [A few exceptions are there but I’m talking about the majority]. What they all feel is if the child gets a mark of more than 90 in a subject, then his education has been wonderful and he is brilliant. No… that’s not at all the thing!!!!..There are much more….. I never see an open space for the children to express themselves. By children I mean a student studying in class KG - Class XII…… There is no open forum where he can talk or discuss about what he feels… We’ve always heard and seen teacher’s judge on the children who don’t pay attention to studies. We’ve really had a very few teacher’s with us who identifies what else interest that particular child.

For me education means not just learning a few subjects, it’s about imparting a moral value in a person where he / she develops himself / herself as a personality and make others reflect on them….. Our entire system of school has just compressed the life of a child into a classroom with four walls and a blackboard and yes not to forget the two hours in a week Physical Training period where we get to go beyond the bounded wall….. Every lecture was for one hour, where a few teacher’s were extremely supreme in making the children scare on them on their entry [usually people gets scared only on Villain’s entry on screen]. There were a few teachers’s who made their class a very pleasant space to be and a few made the children sleep as well…… Some of the teacher’s reflected their frustrations from home on the children….. All these makes a child to think a few things in the class [at lease I defend these points from my point of view only]…..

1. When will the recess bell ring…
2. When will the lunch period begin….
3. When will I reach back home….

I also remember we all used to stand up when the teacher comes in and when they walk out. It’s an honor which we pay to the people who are making us….. And it should come from the child’s heart, but in most of the cases our adoration came in on compulsion……

Teachers should be learners….. They should keep exploring the possibility of innovative and interesting things which interests children. Recently I got to meet a teacher who teaches class I in a school [name with held :)], and I was interacting with her on education and how school should be and what are the practices which we can bring in by innovative education etc. She was hearing all the stories….interestingly :). Finally I was sharing about some of the interesting books like John Holt’s Escape from Childhood, Instead of Education.. Books like Divaswapna, Tho-tho chan which shares about the introspectiveness of children and innovative education and learning. After hearing all these things she replied “I’m sorry, I might sound rude but I don’t want to read all these things and you are going over bored by advising me”. I was shell shocked and I really felt pity for those children who she’ll be teaching. If a teacher is not ready to learn about things which the children needs and can’t adjust to it then what will they do at the school? I just felt that the teacher is in fact seriously ruining a couple of futures.

Finally to conclude on, Today is teacher’s day but how many of us called back or wished our teacher’s who put in efforts to make us what we are today?..... Only a very few of us, wishes a very few of our teachers, nevertheless we wish all our friends on friendship day and on their birthdays too… We always have a habit of doing back things, and we call it as reciprocation, and in fact Newton’s third law too says every action has an equal and opposite reaction [though logically fits the discussion, but technically not], but have we ever reciprocated something for our teachers????...have we ever reached them back and thanked them???...... Then what is the education we got or what the education the system has given?. We all are a part of educated illiterate……. When we are educated illiterates then “hamaari Siksha hi adhoori” [our education is incomplete]……

Friday, August 22, 2008

एक अनुभव!!!

This is the first article I wrote in Hindi almost a year and half back for Parichay's Newsletter :)

परिचय के साथ मेरे रिश्ते की उम्र अभी दो साल हो गई है! परिचय को जानना मेरी ज़िन्दगी का पहला मौका था जो मुझे कुछ बच्चों के पास ले गया! मैं इसके पहले भी कुछ सामाजिक कर्यों से जुडा हुआ था, लेखिन कहीं पर भी मैंने बच्चों के साथ काम नही किया था! इसीलिए पहली बार जब मैं परिचय गया थो मुझे बहुत अच्छा लगा और बहुत खुशी मिली! मैं उस दिन को अभी भी याद कर पार रहा हूँ जिस दिन सुबह हम लोग परिचय पहुंचे थे... पहले बार मैं बच्चों से मिला और विजय भैया से भी! मैं बच्चों को कुछ सिखाने के विचार से ही परिचय गया था, लेखिन वहां पहुँचने के बाद ही मुझे पता चला कि मैं बच्चों को कुछ सिखा नही सकता.. और उसी दिन यह भी पता चला कि मुझे इन बच्चो से बहुत कुछ सीखना है, ऐसा कुछ जो मुझे अब तक मेरी जिंदगी नही सिखा पाई! उस दिन से आज तक मैं परिचय कुछ सीखने के लिए ही जा रहा हूँ और वापस कुछ सीखकर ही आता हूँ, जो पिछले चौबीस सालों मैं पाठशाला और प्रयोगशाला ने नही सिखाया!
मैं बाल मनोविज्ञान नही जानता लेखिन यह कह सकता हूँ कि रानी, मोनी, सोना, हीरा, बुलबुल, तरुन्नुम और मोनू को शायद मैं अच्छी तरह से जानता हूँ! एन बच्चों मैं एक आग है जो हमेशा जलती रहती है! मैं इस आग कि तपिश को इनसे बात करते समय और कक्षा मैं सीखने के दौरान इनकी लगन को देखकर महसूस किया! जब मैं इन बच्चों से मिला था तो मुझे पता नही था कि इनमे से कही बच्चें अपने स्कूल मैं सबसे अच्छे नम्बर पर आते हैं! लेखिन उसी समय महसूस किया कि ये खुद को साबित कर सकते हैं, और बाद मैं पता चला कि ऐसा ही हो रहा है!
मोनी ने पूछने पर बताया कि वह डॉक्टर बनना चाहती है! मैं तो सिर्फ़ इतना जानता हूँ कि हमारे देश मे स्कूल में जाकार किसी पहली कक्षा के बच्चों से भी पूछो कि वह क्या बनना चाहते हैं तो जवाब मिलेगा कि वह या तो डॉक्टर, या फिर इंजिनियर बनना चाहता है, यह अलग बात है कि उसे डॉक्टर - इंजिनियर का मतलब नही पता होता! लेखिन जब मोनी ने मुझसे कहा थो मैं महसूस कर पाया की वह सब कुछ समझती है और समझकर ही कहती है! मैं सब लोगों से कहने चाहता हूँ की यह लड़खी एक दिन ज़रूर डॉक्टर बनेगी!
विजय भैया से मिलने के बाद मुझे ये लगा कि उन जैसा एक भी काम अगर हमारे गाँव मे शुरू कर दिया ना तो हमारे देश के हालात बदल जायेंगे! विजय भैया के बातें सुनने के लिए ही मैं काफ़ी बार परिचय गया हूँ! उनके विचारों सुनकर किसी भी आदमी के मन मैं अपने देश के लिए विशन आ जायेगा! मैं बच्चों और भैया को धन्यवाद् करना चाहता हूँ उन्होंने मेरे हिन्दी को टोलेरेट किया और उससे सुधरने मैं मेरी मदद भी कि! इसी कोशिश के चलते विजय भैया मुझसे हिन्दी में यह सब लिखवा कर सफल भी हो गए...और विजय भैया का मतलब ही है "सफलता"!

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

A Day with Bhopali's during their hunger strike

We called for a Global Action Day on 28th June, 2008 for the Bhopali’s sitting on indefinite hunger strike. We decided to call for solidarity fast that day with lot of people showing interest and enthusiasm. We decided to go to the dharna site at Jantar Mantar and sit with the bhopali’s the whole day. We managed to reach there by around 12.00 noon after a few work back home. I was on my second day of fast [I was having a 3 day fast from 27th to 29th].

As I’ve been going there regularly, now most of the people around recognize me. We sat around and soon more AID Delhi volunteers started to join us. Darshan, Kannan, Anand went to Sathyu and started to discuss with him. Later Abhinav and Anuradha joined them. I simply lay down and had a quick nap [to compensate my sleep for the last night]. Then I too joined the discussion there. I was slightly feeling some head ache due to my fast as I usually get head ache if proper food is not taken.

Around 12.30 we had media people around for a press conference and the children sitting at dharna announced to the press they would be now moving to prime minister’s house to hand over the hearts made by the school children of Delhi and by the Bhopal children’s as Prime Minister have lost his heart. They’ve made a large number of hearts and after the initial hiccups with the policemen they went along with the policemen and handed over the hearts at the P.M’s home.

After a couple of minutes when they came back, they were thrilled to explain every moment to Rachna and others about what happened there. Satabdi and Debamitro too joined us. Then we decided to wear pla-cards on our shoulders and sit on the truncation part of the road so that people who pass by can read the message. Me and Debamitro walked down and were preparing to sit, by then I got a call from Nitin saying that the children from Aashayen [one of our AID Delhi’s educational initiative] are here to make heart for the Prime Minister. The children from Bhopal explained them about the dharna and the issues and soon the children from Aashayen made heart for the P.M quickly and they left. We also had Nishant and Sherry joining us by then.

We were by then quite a number of volunteers there and started to have what is our stand an the issue?. Are we anti-DOW or are we looking for the clean up first?. Lot of questions rose from the volunteers and Shalini [Coordinator, SFB] joined us the discussion and we had a good brain storming on corporate accountability.

Finally we signed off in the evening around 6.00 and for lot of volunteers it was a life time experience to sit with the people who are on indefinite hunger strike. Our support for Bhopal and Bhopali’s will always remain the same.

Now it is the time when we are rejoicing victory of our struggle.......

Saturday, August 9, 2008

Expressions Unlimitted!!!

A Sorry for holding this post for such a long time

Was in a dilemma whether to post it or not, but as I’ve mentioned this entire blog would be based on my experiences and my journey, I’ve decided to post it.
I did my primary education in A.V.Rm.V Matriculation School, which was a co-ed school. I did my schooling till class V in it which actually molded this mud into Selva and as I was not able to afford the fees there my parents decided to move me to P.L.W.A Hr. Sec. School which was / is in Vickramasingapuram, a few kilometers away from Ambasamudram. It’s a very famous school in our Taluk which provides not only quality education but also quality human values [as per my personal observation]. It’s again a co-ed school but here the system doesn’t allow a boy to talk to a girl. There were strict rules that were followed with sever punishmentsJ, But still I was never hesitant / felt shy in talking to a girl as my experience in previous school was different. I was the shortest of the class and used to sit in front bench and once the interaction with the new faces started to develop, we mostly used to avoid / ignore talking to girls because there was no need for it and more over the system was also a bit responsible for it and above all the comments which would come from our other male counterpart was in mind.
It was a time when we moved to class 8. By the time I had a few of thick friends in the circle and I remember we 5 guys in a bench were named as “Panjapandavargal” [Five Pandavs], though the group started to split after class 7th because of the rearrangement in our seating. It’s almost the time when one gets into the real teen age. When everyone start to see the mirror and felt excited about budding mustache. I was not an exception on that. I always dreamt of having a mustache and feel so happy to see when it’s budding and also have felt jealous of fellow classmates who had more and a bit dense. Despite all these things, I was somehow never attracted towards girls.
That’s the time when she joined our class. She was fair, not so tall and with average built, but at that point of time she was just another girl in the class [at least for me]. One fine morning it was quite surprising to see the girl on the stage during an event and sing a western song. At that time western songs was something unheard and unusual to us [though we did study in an English medium school]. Though she was not at her best but was quite commendable. I was a bit eager to know her history by then and did found out too J [that’s human problem]. It was by then obvious that I wanted to develop a friendship with her [nothing else by that time], and wanted to interact. Suddenly when thinking of talking to her, I don’t know where the hell the shyness crept in and finally ended up in not even approaching her. I was very much excited about the all new expression in the face and mind which I conveyed to my bench mates [with whom one need to spend all the day]. Then started to glow the “dimaag ki batti”. Slowly I started to build a strategy to approach.
It was with a help of the local boy who used to interact with one of our class mate as she resides nearby his house [I was from Ambasamudram as I mentioned]. I first started to talk to that girl and slowly got in touch with her. She was not a localite and she also travels the same route which I travel. It’s all those general blah blah’s which started to build our friendship.
Those two years were in fact one of the best phases of life [Class VIIIth to Class Xth]. I don’t know what happened and how it happened but the truth is we really enjoyed our friendship [rather relationship, though nothing were in our minds], but at times people do talk something. It was all of a blushing situation at times but those were wonderful expressions. Within no time, we started to talk a lot [though officially in the school premises boys are not supposed to talk to girls], and express each to other in a special manner [might be infatuation, but I was sure it was not that and I didn’t have an idea of what she thought of it].
The most beautiful and highlight of the things are the glimpses which flashes every now and then from both the sides J and particularly when some boring class is going on [mostly being social science class, as he used to really kill us with his stories, but we enjoyed it a lot :D]. Not to forget, early in the morning once I enter into the class, the eyes search for her and once it spots her the head nods a “Good Morning!”, and when her eye nods and reply with a million dolor smile in the face, my day starts. [ I don’t know to name the feel and the expression, but those were with no limits and no ends, I also don’t know how does she felt about it]. I also remember a day when I went to her house and we chit chatted for about more than 6 hours [usually I never go to any of my friends house as my parents didn’t allow me to]. One of my class mate stayed very close to her house and used to ask what’s happening dude?, but it’s like nothing man!!!. We’ve shared almost a lot of talking together. I’ve also told her a lot of things which I didn’t share with some of my male counter parts. That doesn’t mean that I avoided / ignored them, but this was something special. I have great buddies on my male counterpart with whom I really enjoyed everything at school [it will be another special article which will come up soon].
After 10th I went on to join my Diploma in Chennai and almost lost contact with most of my friends and my family moved to Erode which is far away from Ambasamudram. I wrote a few letters when I was in college but somehow I never got a reply. She was an above average student and I thought she might do her engineering but she didn’t [I got to know this from a few of my friends]. I still had touch with a very few of my best pals in school and through them I started to gather most of my class mates. Thanks to the web and mail service providers. We started yahoo groups and Google groups for our childhood buddies and now are in touch with each other. Still I couldn’t find her. Tried her house number a couple of times…. Not in use……..

Still I don’t know what is that relationship… it was definitely more than friendship with Expressions Unlimited!!!!!

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

மார்கழி காலை

சூரியன் உதிக்கும்முன்னே விழித்திடும் வீதி
பட்டையிட்டு பஜனை பாட புறப்படும் மக்கள்
சில்லென்ற காலையில் அம்மா கை காபி
குளிப்பதற்கு மிதமனை சூட்டில் பதமான வெந்நீர்

இல்லத்தின் முன்பு இடும் பூசணிப்பூ கோலம்......
பூஜையறை உள்ளிருந்து சாம்பிராணி வாசம்...
வீதியிலே நடக்கும் போது உணர்திடுவோம் சொர்க்கம்....

அதிகாலை கோவிலிலே ஒலிதிடும் மணிகள்
பெருமாள் கோவில் தயிர்சாத பிரசாதம்
சொர்க்கத்தில் வழியில் நடந்து வந்து அமிர்தம் உண்ட உணர்வு.......
வேறெங்கும் வருமா இப்படி ஒரு நினைவு?????

The people who rise before the sun

People who comes out to chant on the roads

Mummy's hand coffee on a chill morning

And a bucket of warm water at mild temperature to bath

The rangoli's in front of house with flowers on it

The essence of fragrance from the agarbati's at the houses

We feel heaven when we walk on the street

The early morning bells ringing from the temple

The curd rice prasatham from Perumal temple

Gives a feel of eating Amritam after walking through Heaven

Will I get such a thought if I live anywhere else????


Please read this poem in Internet Explorer 6 + or Mozilla 3 + or Opera 9 + [else font problem occurs]

चलते चलते दो साल गुसार गए!
जानते नही आगे क्या होगा
इसी हालात में पहले भी थे!
तब भी जाने नही आगे क्या होगा

उन आंखों में सपना नही थे!
अब मैं मेरा सपना उनके आखों में देखने लगा!
उन दिलों में चाहत नही थी!
अब मेरे चाहतें को उन दिलों महसूस करने लगा!
उन दिमाग में विचारों नही थी!
अब मेरे विचारों से उनके विचारों मिलने लगा!
उस जिंदगी में कोई ख्वाहिश नही थी!
अब उन जिंदगी का कहीं सारे तात्पर्य होने लगा!

हम अब जान गएँ हमारी दक्षता!
और पता चल गया हमारा मकसद!
हमें चाहिए उनहे एक विकास!
और उसके लिए हम करते रहेंगे प्रयास!

Sunday, June 15, 2008

A Story Untold

All the Characters, Incidents potrayed in this story are fictitious. Any resemblence of the characters in living or dead is pure coincidence.

Vimala woke up that day early in the morning. Usually she wakes up at 4.00 so that she could finish her morning business before the entire community wakes up, usually all the women in the community does the same thing, but this day still woke up even earlier. That must be because of the noise that was coming from the huge vehicles that passed through her house. She just came out in eagerness to see what is happening around and found most of her company stood out. She didn’t know it was 2.00 in the morning as her house had no clock. There were conversations going on that approximately it could be 3.00 in the morning while some one loudly announced the time as 2.00. Vimala could see the frustration in everyone’s face and obviously on her’s too on the mirror. It was chill night with a freezing temperature of 2 degrees as per the prediction of weather reporters and it must be less than the predicted temperature as the community lives on the bank of Yamuna. Still she was wondering what why those vehicles passed around this early in the morning. The moon was shining like a diamond and the reflected rays from the roof of the closely packed houses served the purpose of streetlights which never glow.
Vimala walked out of her house and saw Sheena her neighbor.
“Arey Sheena!, tu bhi ut gayi?” [Hey Sheena! you too woke up]

“haan didi! voh kuch aawaz aayi thi na” [Yes Sister!, I heard the noise]

“chalo achca hai, mein soch rahi thi ki akele kaise jaaoon” [I was wondering how will I go alone]

“haan didi!, mein bhi chalti hoon, ab jaldi ut gayi tho…” [Yes Sister!, I’ll also join you, I’ve also woken up early…]

“didi paani le liya na?” [Sister, have you take water?]

“kyun?, jaa tho hain hum nadhi ke kinaare par” [Why?, aren’t we going to the river base?]

“nahi didi, nadhi ka paani mein haath rakha tho bhimari fhail jaayegi” [No Sister, We’ll be infected if we touch the river water].

Vimala gave a smile and both walked to the bank of the river and the conversation continued.

“Arey Sheena!, mujhe samaj mein nahi aa rahi hai ki yeh bada bada macheene kayku aayi, tujhe pata hai ka?” [Hey Sheena!, I was wondering why these big machines came here!. Do you know it?]

“hume ka pata didi, ho saktha hai colony mein paani ki tankee banana ke liye aaya ho” [How do I know sister!, probably it might have come for the construction of water tank in the colony]

“haan ho saktha hai” [ Yes its possible]

This was what the entire colony thought because they have fought with the government for a couple of months back for the same. The men at the community started to disperse when the clock read 8.00. They all were mostly rickshaw pullers, a few were working at the near by industry [plays a major role in polluting the river]. The women resumed their household business once the men were off. Vimala was so happy that day as she dreamt of avoiding walking a long distance to bring water to her house. She also went on to cook ‘kheer’ that day which is only made during festivals. In fact the same was the case with the other houses too.
Suddenly Vimla recognized Sheena running into her house. Sheena shouted

“didi, didi!, meine jo bana rahi thin a voh kheer jal gayi” [Sister, sister, the sweet dish I made burnt off].

“hey bhagwan, mein tho dar hi gayi thi”, [Oh God!, I really got scared]replied Vimala.

“bachaooo!... arey koi tho inhe rokho!!.... yeh kya ho raha hai!!!.... [Help!... Hey!, some one stop these guys!!... What the hell is happening here!!!...] they both heard these screaming and rushed out of their home.
Yes all these were happening there at their colony. No one knew or even thought about this. The machine which they thought in the morning which would fetch them water, was not turning out to be the Devil!. The things were thrown out and the vessels rolled on the road. Vimala felt that the machine that they were wondering as the one which came to fetch them water now turned out to take off their houses. Yes, the demolition operations were ‘ON’. Vimala couldn’t even think what she can do, within a flash she ran in back to the house and started to pack things of her new born baby into a bag. She didn’t even have more bags to pack the rest of the things.
People were screaming and running all around and slowly the news started to spread off that this operation is carried out because the government was planning to build a games village at the selected sight for the forthcoming common wealth games and this operation was carried out because of that. Vimala just ran out of the house with the bag and her child and found that the destruction machine was just a few meters away from her house. She just tried to join the other group of people and watch the rest. It took two more hours for them to do the complete operations.
“Silence” was the only language left over there at that time. Even the children didn’t cry. The dust particles which came from the destructed buildings were still in the air creating dusky atmosphere. The moisture in the air gave a darker look to the scene. People were just concentrating on re-locating their things here and there, trying to collect as many as possible.
Suddenly a vehicle rushes in with a huge noise and an announcement followed from that.

“Sarkar ne yahan par 2010 ki hone wale ‘common wealth games’ ke liye ek khel gaon banane ka soch rahe hain. Isliye aap sab logon ka ghar thoda gaya kyunki is jagah ko aap log kanoon ke khilaaf kabza kiye hain. Aap sab logon ko iske alawa delhike border ke paas doosra jaga diya jaayega. Jin logon ke paas apne pehchaan patr hai ve kal subah taluk office mein aake apne zameen ke kagazon le jaa sakthe hain”.

[The government is thinking to make a games village here for the upcoming commonwealth games in 2010. So your houses were abolished because you’ve occupied this land against the law and order. You all will get an alternate house allotted by the government somewhere in the border of Delhi. You are requested to come and collect the papers related to the house allotted to you from Taluk Office tomorrow. Houses will be allotted only for those who carry their identity cards]

“array , 10 saal ke baad hone wale khel ke liye ek gaon banane ke liye soch rahe hain, aur uske liye 10000 logon ka ghar thodenge, aur oopar se bolenge ki hamaara ghar kanoon ke khilaaf banaya gaya. Kya hamaara desh mein hum rehna kaanoon ki khilaaf hai”…. [The government thinks for making a games village for a game which is going to happen 10 years later and for doing that they will demolish houses of more than 10000 people and above all they will say that we are criminals as we have made our houses without permission. Is it a crime to live in our own country?] Uttered someone while dispersing.

Yes these people were forced to move out of the banks of Yamuna, the reason being Yamuna getting polluted. But no one can understand the pain they had that day. It will go on the books and records as an achievement of government on the process of the river cleaning [focused on the common wealth games village], but it will always remain as a black day for the people who left their life and livelihood there.

Few months later, they were moved to a new colony which had a house without roof, streets without road, street lights without electricity and taps without water.

“Sheena!, lagta hai ki ab phir se hume hamaari ladayi shuru karni padege” [Sheena!, it seems that we have to re-iterate our fight]…said Vimala.

“haan didi, yeh aapke liye theesri baar hogi!!: [Yes, sister exclaimed Sheena!]…

Six years later they have reached a state where their colony has got all the basic facilities. They also came to know that they have Right to Information Act now…They brought in all the facilities into the colony and it started to develop. Years rolled on.

Yet another early morning… Vimala woke up hearing the sound of a huge vehicle passing her house.

“Hey Bhagwan!!!!....phir se nahi!” [Oh God!!!!...not again!]

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

The Climax

This is the continuation of
Why Can't I
Those tensed moments

So I request the readers to read the below mentioned articles before reading the current one. Else you'll not be able to understand and relate....

That night, when we were having dinner at Sakunthala International, I was feeling like somewhere in heaven seeing a scoop of vanilla ice-cream dressed with cherry on its head and with biscuit wings… [I couldn’t even realize that time that it’s happening to me, considering my family status]. I couldn’t feel like eating the chapattis too…. Just had lots of ice cream and we were traveling back to Ambasamudram. One of our seniors father had bought his car and we were traveling in it [Again traveling a car gives more pleasure, to be honest we called the car as PLEASURE CAR in our village].

It must be somewhere around 12.00 in the midnight when we landed and they dropped me in the bus stop from where I have to walk home alone and that night there was no power in the street. For a moment I thought should I ask them to drop me at my home but then I decided to take a walk. I had no fears but all I was worried about was the street dogs. I tried to divert my thinking and start to get thinking about the event…..

A few hours earlier, I could hear the claps in my ears…… the whole hall going on its hands…..

By the time I reached the stage the painting competition got over and everyone was eyeing on me. The performers who did the Monoact before me did a pathetic job by involving two or more characters in it and I was the only one who went on the stage alone to do mono act… There were two mikes available in a distance of three feet length and I decided to walk from one to another for two different characters….

I started of with a narration about my story and moved from one to another to portray the different roles….. It was flawless when I started and went on and I could even see the audience mesmerizing with my performance at the stage… [I always look into the eyes of the audience and have a good view of the entire auditorium whenever I perform. I believe that makes the people look at you other than paying attention somewhere else.].

Suddenly a dog barking and running towards me, gave a shock and in the darkness I couldn’t even see the dog but suddenly I bent down myself to pick up a stone and reacted quickly, pretending that I’m going to throw the stone on the dog. It ran away……..I was smart enough…. Again when I went back to the memories, I could hear the applauds of the audience.

That was the noise from the prize distribution ceremony for the monoact. The first prize goes to Rosemary Matriculation School and the second prize goes to “so and so school” and the third prize goes to “so and so school”……but what happened to my power packed performance?.. The mesmerizing act...

Yes it all happened because of the conflict I had in the climax…. I was so stupid to give a long pause before I deliver my dialogues in the last minutes because of the conflict I had in the climax and that long pause made me loose the event which was a two day preparation which could have ended with a great result.

While walking back to home I realized that, “I didn’t know that a dog will bark on me, but somehow I was smart enough to pick a stone and make it run, but I wasn’t smart enough at the climax to turn back the climax and deliver a dialogue what I wanted to”…. What would have happened if I didn’t take the stone?, the dog might have bitten? [Probably]… I realized its not only a hard work its also smart work some times work out…….

Everything happens for good and my loss in the event taught me this: D

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Cutest Advertisement

I remember those olden days when we used to skip TV channels [those DD days], when advertisement appears, but now a days things have changed. I'm prefering to watch advertisements than the program :D.... This particular AD has really stollen hearts.... and its charming enough

This advertisement reminds me the old school days when we used to share ink. I'm a great lover of Ink pens and I remember such kind of ink exchange between friends were common [might not be in an exam hall]..... The cute style of the guy with a hero pen lending ink and the charming smile and the stunning satisfied eyes of the girl, are really really soothening to the heart while watching.... I feel very very happy and enjoy myself whenever I see this AD..... The background music also has been scored good and it adds value to the Advertisement.
A really Cute and Charming Ad of times.....

Monday, May 5, 2008

நினைவு நல்லதாய் வேண்டும்

பாடல்களில் எனக்கு பிடித்த வரிகளைப்பற்றி எழுத நினைத்தேன்..... அதில் முதலில் நினைவுக்கு வந்தது இதுவே....... இந்த பாடல் மனதில் உறுதி வேண்டும் திரைப்படத்தின் தலைப்பு பாடல்.......

மனதில் உறுதி வேண்டும்.....
வார்த்தையிலே இனிமை வேண்டும்......
நினைவு நல்லதாய் வேண்டும்......

இந்த வரிகளுடன் நான் "கனவு மெய்ப்பட வேண்டும்" என நினைத்தேன்........

எவ்வளவு ஆழமான வரிகள்.... மனதில் உறுதி இருக்கையில் ஒருவரது குறிக்கோள் கூர்மையாக இருக்கும்.... அப்போது பல விஷயங்களை சிந்திக்க தோன்றாது.....அந்த ஒரு தருணத்தில்... வார்த்தைகளில் இனிமை காப்பது ஒருவரால் இயன்றால் அது மிகப்பெரிய செயல்...... தொடரும் நினைவு நல்லதாய் வேண்டும் என்ற வரியின் அர்த்தமும் அதுவே..... இம்மூன்றும் சேர்ந்த குணமுடைய ஒருவரின் கனவு மெய்ப்பட வேண்டுமென்பது எனதாசை.........

As per a few requests here goes the translation
I thought of writing my favorite lines from a few tamil movie songs and this one came to my mind as soon as I wanted to pendown. This song is the title song of the film "Manadhil Urudhi Vendum"...The song goes as....

"One need to have a strong heart....
One need to have polite and sweet words.....
One need to have clean and neat thoughts....."

What a deep writing...When we have a strong heart our mind will be sharper in achieving that and at that time its impossible to have sweet words and if a person can do that then its a great deed....even if he manages sweet and polite word the one following next is the toughest to do.... clean and neat thoughts.... If a person is able to do it and if someone is trying to do it, then their desires should come true is what my wishes are....

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Life is Beautiful.......

I’ve always talked and thought about this tag “Life is Beautiful….”…. without argument everyone [who reads this are well connected to net and stuff :P] agrees yes life is beautiful, but there are some more but’s to it before we conclude :D. Here the protagonist mainly see’s the entire thing from his point [i.e me], but also leaves an option open for the readers to look from their perspective, if the readers mindset tune in with the protagonist’s [i.e mine], then my life is easy [to make you understand].

We all started to go to school from the age of 3 years and odd months, from where we’ve been exploring world outside a few individuals whom we’ve come across. Till that time the few individuals must have treated us so sweetly and taken care of us with all the love and affection from the world as we might have meant the world to us. [O.k, I should shift and narrate the story from my view point :D]. Now I start to go to school, come across various set of other me’s [I mean like me of the same age and not the other categories :P], and we all started to sense a feel of loneliness among a crowd. Also not to forget the teachers here, who take intense care of the children of that age with the perseverance got from the entire world. Life seemed to be very difficult on the first few odd days to school, but after a couple of days when I forget to bring my pencil, some one lends me one to show care [if not the level my parent’s would’ve but enough to save me from the teacher at that point of time by lending the pencil]. A sweet little smile exchanged and I get a person who feels for me and whom I can feel for, the first stage of Friendship….. ran the days non stop from there till we bid off farewell some day. Life has been beautiful with them. The world has become bigger.

Same is the case when we moved to college or even to a new work place. I’ve always celebrated every moment of my life. I mean I really have celebrated. For me life has been so difficult right from the beginning. I’ll be putting down some of really critical phases of me a few months down here, but those difficulties have made “SELVA”. I’m what my life taught me. I’m what my life is. I have had excess of emotions like happiness, depression, anger, sentiment, binding, care, commitment from my early age. Above all Frustration is the feel which I love to. I’ve enjoyed my frustrations to the most. Only a very few [mostly my mom] have seen my frustration, but after every frustration I find a determination. Its usually with everyone I suppose, but frustration is beautiful.

At some stage most of the people start to live life with frustration….so obviously life becomes beautiful. [atleast for some period of life]. O.k…O.k… hold on… now me seeing life of mine from my point of view and describing it, some where I feel it illogic to say that “Life is Beautiful…..” as a general statement……someone said me once please add “my” to that tag….. I thought, felt and explored it…. Let’s take an example of a very poor girl’s life.

Amri… a girl who begs [she proudly says after earning some bugs, that I earned this much :D] at dilli haat hardly earns around Rs.50 per day [not the exact average], and out of that almost 98% goes to her household expense. I’ve been interacting with her for quite some time and she is so sweet and smart girl. One day I was enquiring with her why she is not attending the classes which we conduct for the children at dilli haat.

“Amri tum class kyun nahi aati?” [Amri, why are you not coming to classes?]

“mein nahi aaoongi bhaiya” [I’ll not come brother]

“kyun nahi aaoogi?” [Why you’ll not come?]

“mujhe padhna accha nahi lagta hai” [I don’t like to study]

“phir kya karma pasand hai tumhe?” [ then what do you like to do?]

“isa hi khelna hai” [I just want to play like this]

“agar abhi nahi padhogi tho kya hoga pata hai?” [Do you know what will happen if you don’t study now]

“nahi, lekhin padhne ke baad aap jaise hi banoongi na?” [No, but I’ll also become like you only after I study na?]

That’s it, everything packed in one answer. Can I enjoy what she does with all the education and stuff I’ve got?, probably I may do it like playing on the road but I’m not sure all my fellow beings would be doing it. Got a point clearly stacked [which I knew earlier too…but now to make it clear to you], money and education are not the solutions to the cheer in life. Amri could laugh and dance where Selva can’t do it. Amri can do whatever she wants which none of us can do it even though we want to do. Aren’t we all thinking on something like throwing off all the stuffs and just chilling out [On Amri’s language “Khelna hai”], but we are not able to do…… we’ve frustrations and we live with that and Amri doesn’t have frustrations and she lives with that. Probably Amri might not have known about the other so called comfort limits we people have, to justify herself that education is not important, but till the time she doesn’t compare things, her Life is Beautiful…..Once she starts to compare she’ll come into the frustration domain and frustration makes life beautiful……

So friends stop comparing, “Life is Beautiful…..” Live it we all have got only one :D

[Forced to cut short the article keeping readers patience in mind :D, will come up with a few more examples latter with some other name :P]

Thursday, April 24, 2008

A Learner's Chapter

Parichay is the first place where I stepped in on to the new world of volunteering. Not many of volunteer get a chance to start learning volunteering from Parichay. It was a fine morning when I, Somen and one more girl Priya met at IIT main gate to move to the project. It was one and half hour travel with the modes of bus, auto-rickshaw and cycle-rickshaw travel. Before reaching parichay itself I had a lot to learn from the road from bhajanpura to tukhmirpur. I could imagine and interpret the state of mind of the people at that place (though that was an imagination of an immature so called volunteer who was on his first sight visit).

After all the way of travel when we reached the building with a block of bricks arranged on the front and loads of bundles of paper wounded and kept aside on both sides of the entrance. There were children all around with namasthe bhaiya and namasthe didi…while we entered into the block. Man I thought Somen must be a hero here; he got such a reception which I’ve earlier seen only in Rajnikanth movies on screen, a live experience.

Once we stepped into the block on the left hand side we had / have a steep steps leading to the first floor…..I just imagined “Parichay is already on top”.

A quick little flashback……. Me, Somen and Anirban used to have dinner quite often and during our dinner we talk about Parichay, AID, Volunteering etc., etc., we used to talk a lot about Parichay, the children and bhaiya…. I from there on had an imagination of Parichay with two separate rooms on a ground beautifully decorated with lots of charts having a small garden in front of it. Both the rooms surrounded with a series of flower pots [this is not my mistake, movies have shown things like that :D].

Back to the situation, I started to realize that I’m realizingJ. [I mean the reality may be different from cinematic imagination]. Up we went, and walked on the corridor, passing the unfolded cots, the vessels waiting to be cleaned and the clothes just getting a bath. Vijay bhaiya was waiting there for us and with a warm welcome; we had an introduction with the children. I could remember, Monu, Tarannum, Moni, Heera and Sona were the people I recognized on my first visit. After a lot of talk, bhaiya said us you can go to the next room and teach the children.

I was a bit clueless on what to teach, but me as usual ready to take up the new challenge. Priya somehow managed to gather the children and start to teach them how to look at the watch / clock to read time. I start to interact to a few children and start to teach them English. I thought I’m smart enough to take English class and started with ‘A’. In came a question,

“bhaiya yeh ‘A’ kyun hai?....

I was just feeling like a air plucked balloon. Infact the children were smart enough to understand my feel and said “theek hai, aage batayiye”….

I went there to teach the children and I was taught by the children that I’m not prepared enough to do so, it was a great learning from them and infact if this might not have happened that day, my entire experience of volunteering might have been different. Even today I go to parichay to learn and not to teach [though some times I share a few of my knowledge with children, I never call that as teaching].

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Trip to Gangotri..... Part 1

It was a pleasant surprise to hear from Ravi that he has plans to visit me on his way to BITS, Pilani. When he reached, he also wanted me to make a plan for a 3 day trip to somewhere. I’m always on for a trip and journeys as I like to travel a lot. I always looked for an opportunity to explore Himalayas and river Ganga and this was a right time to execute it. We decided to go to Gangotri. It was early November when Delhi got into a pleasant weather and chillness spreading out across the northern parts of India. We planned to take a cab ride all the way. It all started 2nd November, 2007 early morning 06.00.

Ravi, at school times was not this talkative, it was good fun to be with a school mate after such a long time and that too for three continues days without any other disturbances. The driver was so good to keep the pace of the vehicle not exceeding 80 kmph on the highway. After three hours of drive since we started, we thought of breaking for break fast. We came across a highway stoppage place called “Cheetal Grand”, which was too good with lots of food option, {like a food court in malls, with beautiful garden around. We grabbed sandwich and pakoras along with a map of Uttarakand. [It also had a book store :D]

A non-stop journey from there to Haridwar, and we decided to wash Ravi's sins in the holy Ganges. Ravi was there for the first time and I asked him to take bath so that he also can become [atleast try to become] like the "holy me" :D. I’ve already taken bath in Ganges for a couple of time earlier to increase its holiness :P. Ravi then wanted me too to take a dip so that its holiness will be enriched and I did. When we got back to our car, we had a shock to hear from the near by bhaiya as he said Gangotri is closed. I knew that Gangotri and its route would be closed for a couple of months during the winters and this was unexpected. As Ravi like me is open to take up challenges, we decided to go as far as possibleJ. I also had an alternate plan of River Rafting at Rishikesh and a quick trip to Dehradun if possible.

Past Rishikesh [we didn’t stop there as we decided to stop there when we get back], we started to drive up the hills as I started to enjoy the scenic view of the ranges. The feel you get when you sit on the front seat along by the driver, riding on a mountain, cannot be put on words. We were traveling at a pace of 25kmph, which I think is the optimum speed to drive at mountain range. We had a few stoppages to capture the views in camera [by doing it we lost the camera cover :( ]. By now we’ve passed a couple of valleys[couldn’t count exactly the numbers], and we observed a stream running alongside the road in the opposite direction of our travel. We again thought to break for lunch at around 15.00 hours and we had a delicious lunch along with an awesome tea [must be a herbal one], for Rs.45/- for three people.

We got back to business and started to travel back. I observed a village at every 5th Kilometer. Terrace cultivation was at all the corners. Children going to school. Mobile phones all across. Cricket on road with ball made with cloth [I suppose]. But still they lead a different life with different culture and to term it simple “a difficult life”…..

The rest would follow soon……

Monday, April 21, 2008

A Cinempact

I’ve always been a great lover of cinema and I have my own taste of selecting my favorite movies. I always feel that cinema is a tool which has the potential to tune ones mindset from one frequency to other and if a movie not only tunes, but if possible to set the change in frequency then its an achievement of the story teller. Khuda ke liye is of his genre, which has the capability of tuning and setting the views mindset and leaves you disturbed for quiet some time.

The movie unfolds beautifully without even words spoken, just like a flower. Right on the second scene you are taken into issues which are told delicately. If you keenly notice the movie unfolds the issues of communism, brain drain, gender bias, terrorism and racism. The thought process of two brothers which was same is then becoming contradictory with time is handled with great delicacy. The story has both the brothers as protagonists and moves from there to different parts of the globe which shows the poles in lifestyle. The lead lady has her eyes do the talking, particularly the scene when she comes to know that her father ditched her by separating her from her boyfriend and get her married to her cousin. The remote village without transportation and toilets which cause an impact on the viewers…

You have an educated young youth listening to a local Maulana Tahiri and that changes his life and on the other hand his family which is contradictory to the deeds but not the thoughts. A situation which needs to be handled impeccably. Maulana Tahiri’s words are soothing and convincing enough for anyone who is open to listen.

The elder brother moves to America following his dreams and joins a music school over there; on the other hand the younger one moves to a remote village in the border of Afghanistan to marry his cousin to save the holiness of his uncle’s family. The struggle of the girl to get out and escape from the village makes you pray for her and the scene when all her efforts go in vain, you’ll really have your hearts heavy. The color combination of bright scenes of the American life and the dark / brownish view of the village life adds more feel to the happenings.

Suddenly the director has some surprise for you when the elder brother’s life takes a change. Now if you carefully notice both the brother’s life which took different track, getting into serious trouble. Even though the contradictory minds and thoughts made them to choose their lives, they both suffer and struggle from normal life. On the other hand the fight back shown by both the leading ladies are commendable. After all these surprise you have Nasureenden Shah as Maulana Wali, who is a special package who gives new dimensions to the views on Islam.

Director Shoaib Mansoor succeeds in making you sit, relax and realize a flow of river in front of you. This will remain in one of my all time favorite movie.

Sunday, April 13, 2008

The hours when I loved love

It’s now 13th April, 2008, 03 hours 35 minutes…..

Approximately 24 hours before……

Almost Delhi was deep into silence with its people fallen asleep. I was one among the millions of people who was enjoying sleep. I usually don’t get dream while sleeping. Even if I get dream, I used to forget it the next morning. Dream comes very rarely to me. Usually dream occurs when a person falls deep asleep and the images, thoughts and feelings are experienced through it. I also know that these images are caused because of the Rapid Eye Movement (REM) which happens when a person sleeps deep.

Yes.. This is one such dream I had, probably the best of my life….

I personally don’t have a very good opinion towards Love. I was / (and partly) am not convinced with the theory of Love etc., In fact to agree I’ve had a few infatuations during my school days [which lucky I was matured enough to identify those as infatuation], but never slided towards love.

Without blah blahing much let me straight away enter into the dream. It was fine morning when she came to me. She is a friend of mine.

“Selva, can I ask you one thing?’

“haan, poocho……”

“You should give me an answer straight away.”

“haan zaroor.. kya hua?”

“Will you be my boy friend?”

Some electric shock into the mind, even before understanding what was happening there, my mouth uttered.

“I must be blessed”.

I swear I never had / have such a feel for her in real and I really couldn’t understand what's going on there. Suddenly I realized something and asked her.

“What will happen to the orkut profile wali”.

“………………..” silence was the reply…

“It’s o.k… mein bhi aaur kitne saal wait karoonga” – I replied and I had one question in my mind but didn’t ask her. [That was about her boy friend].

Me, a couple of my friends along with her were on an outing.[I don’t know how days passes so quickly in the dreams…] I could remember it was a resort where there was a long lonely road in which we all were walking, laughing loudly. Suddenly a silence persists, she came along my side and we both were walking. [I could realize that I was too shy in my dream too :D]. My mind was thinking of holding her hands but I just couldn’t do it.

Suddenly I started to feel a warmth of softness in my hands as she grabbed mine and she looked into my eyes after holding my hands, those eyes were asking me, “you were thinking of holding it na?”. With the warmth of her hands on mine and her head resting on my shoulder, I just felt love for the first time :D. I realized that “Life is more than what I’m living now”. I usually keep saying that I fly in the air, but the truth is I was flying at the moment”….. Just started to love the love :P….

We both spoke a lot of silence, the beautiful poetic walk with just eyes doing the talk…. I wanted to break the silence and start to talk, start to share but again I was shy L . She was the one to break it…..

“Selva, yeah bataoo…. What happened to __________ [her boyfriends name]?.

I replied, “Mujhe kya pata”

“I know you won't even ask :) .....mein hi batati hoon…..lekhin ab nahi.. Dinner ke baad’.... I started to expect the dinner time.....

“Selva, get up and prepare the coffee da….” – my friend Giri’s voice.

“Giri you spoiled a wonderful dream”- I uttered and tried to recollect the dream.

The hangover of the dream existed for the next couple of hours with me thinking why such a dream came to me. The concept of the dream is entirely controversial and contradictory to my thought, but then it was a dream and none can help it out.

But those hours I spent in the dream was wonderful and it will stay as a memory for ever and ever…..

Friday, March 28, 2008

The Black and White Theory

In response to my dear friend Arun’s statement on territories of comfort…..

Dude, in the first paragraph you’ve referred to me as the odd one and it was not only me it was everyone among them. In fact, I wasn’t comfortable mentioning the live example considering a few things in my mind, here again I go against what I think, as I mentioned about the protagonist himself / herself turning out to be antagonist being bound to a specific criteria.

The discussion of theory of evolution and territories of comfort was O.K but the entire discussion does not relate to what was mentioned earlier. I think the theory of ‘territories of comfort’ may be well suited to a discussion on competition, but the aforementioned article discussed emotions.

I have categorically pointed out a few things there about categorization and the process that leads to the protagonist becoming an antagonist. Here, I give a simple example to give a better understanding of my statements. There are two groups A and B [lets consider both are of same sex]. Usually the normal tendency of gelling with other colleagues would happen only amongst the cadres, which is again mostly based on the categorization theory1 and very minimally the true care. I basically think the theory of evolution2 is the core cause of the cadre mechanism. I hope everyone agrees.

The key point of discussion is a few of cadre A might / might not get in real / true care with a few of cadre B, but are restricted not to show it out even though they want to because of the categorization theory1. I would term this a black and white theory of human psyche [as I left out the other darker sides in my earlier discussion], I’d only like to talk about the two kinds of dilemma which exist in deciding the individual’s way of living. Either to be with the cadre or to come out of it! The Black side is the one that tends to show the whiteness that is virtually presented without the confrontation, though the white side is focusing somewhere. The white side is the one with the pure idea of emphasizing a person's capacity for self-realization through reason getting to the other side by turning black.

And I was wondering about the extrapolation of the animal theory with humans. This is not about the physical or mental strength one has over the above and dominating because of that. The key point [in terms of cadre], an individual of cadre A wants to gel with an individual of cadre B but couldn’t do it because the rest of his colleagues would consider this as a defection to the other side and to avoid that, the individual cadre A who doesn’t want to gel with the rest of the cadre A is forced to do so, thus going against the odds of what really was his wish. I don’t understand where the chances of getting a girl comes from3.

I completely agree with the theory of territory of comfort3 but it’s nowhere related to the content of my article1.


1.The other side of the coin is rusting…..Sunday, March 9th 2008

2.Theory of Evolution

3.Territories of comfort & competition… Monday, March 24th 2008

Sunday, March 9, 2008

The Other Side of the Coin is Rusting

“We all are living our lives according to our wish” is what we claim but ideally none of us are having a life which we really wanted, but are having one which is purely driven by the standards / image we set among our self in a group of people. This particular blog tell about some of the darker side in the persona’s we usually come across. It might be a bit complicated to understand the entire theme of the write-up we have here but let me beg your pardon to tune your mindset to a level where you could feel that the writer is trying to fit you in somewhere or the other as a protagonist and the protagonist is also the antagonist.
You were told by the author that we are dealing with the darker side of a persona but please remember the darker side is not exactly the person’s psychological darkness [admitting a few of the readers might have and a few might not] but it’s purely the other dark side where one try to over come the original psychological thought process provokingly but not showing out because to maintain the image and the standards set by them among the others.
I’m also able to see the reader’s face shrinking out when reading these lines having a thought process in mind about what exactly this guy is willing to tell and conclude, wait dear one’s the article is still left out.
Whenever we have a couple of people coming together, we have a structure of having a differentiation among the people surrounded. The differentiation is basically categorized by a couple of general terms as age, gender, orientation [not the race], literacy, class and the economy of the protagonist.[Please note that every one in the group is a protagonist by himself]. While categorizing every protagonist want to show the ingenuity of theirs by which they make themselves an antagonist as per the author.
The desire to share a care and love is dependent on the categories we defined above but we all somehow have a feel that it should be and is independent. We call our self as independent but somehow or the other we have forced our self to wear a mask on us without or sometime with our knowledge and the mask I quote here is nothing other than our society to which we are bound to control our emotions, thoughts, and feelings. The society I mean is again the same couple of people who are surrounding us [including the protagonist]. The preference to those people / society is again categorized by the same above mentioned terms which altogether lead to tie the thought process entirely, leading to have a prospection which is ultimately different than what we wish to have.
This fact might be hard to digest but the ugly truth is that we never felt liberal towards the practical process of building / bonding a relationship with the category differentiation which we didn’t want to see, but our thought process might have entirely experienced of going ahead in having it. Just because the fear fact that the couple of people together might fit the protagonist to the differentiated category, the protagonist at one stage becomes an antagonist and refuses to agree the wish which was original.
This extremely ends up in showing the shining side of the coin [the protagonist] and ultimately ends up in hiding the other part[the antagonist]…. And please turn back and see… the other side of the coin is rusting………….
to be continued :)